[ ::: ♥Keep_Mailing♥ ::: ]™ Classical Insults of Olden Era...

Classical Insults of Olden Era!   These glorious insults are from an era when cleverness with words was still valued, before a great proportion of insults became 4-letter words.   1. The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison," and he said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it." 2. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress." 3. "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -- Winston Churchill 4. "A modest little person, with much to be modest about." -- Winston Churchill 5. "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -- Clarence Darrow 6. "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." -- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway). "Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" -- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner) 7. "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." -- Moses Hadas 8. "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." --Mark Twain 9. "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -- Oscar Wilde 10. "I am enclosing two tickets to the FIRST NIGHT of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one." -- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." -- Winston Churchill, in response. 11. "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -- Stephen Bishop 12. "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." -- John Bright 13. "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -- Irvin S. Cobb 14. "He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." -- Samuel Johnson 15. "There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure." -- Jack E. Leonard 16. "They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge." -- Thomas Brackett Reed 17. "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -- Charles, Count Talleyrand 18. "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." -- Forrest Tucker 19. "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -- Mark Twain 20. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -- Oscar Wilde 21. "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." -- Andrew Lang (1844-1912) 22. "He has Van Gogh's ear for music.." -- Billy Wilder 23. "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -- Groucho Marx Capt. Ravi Mahajan Retd.

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