Friday, 20 April 2018

[ ::: ♥Keep_Mailing♥ ::: ]™ Emotional Bank Account - A unique Concept for strong relationships

Emotional Bank Account - For strong relationships

When it comes to improving and maintaining our relationships with others, Stephen Covey's metaphor of the Emotional Bank Account is probably one of the most powerful ideas ever created for the development of interpersonal relationships. If you've never heard of this, it basically means that anyone with whom we have a relationship with, whether it be our coworkers, family or friends, we maintain a personal "emotional" bank account with them. This account begins on a neutral balance. And just as with any bank account, we can make deposits and withdrawals. However, instead of dealing with units of monetary value, we deal with emotional units.

The emotional units that Covey speaks of are centered around trust. When we make emotional deposits into someone's bank account, their fondness, trust, and confidence in us grows. And as a result our relationship develops and grows. If we can keep a positive reserve in our relationships, by making regular deposits, there will be greater tolerance for our mistakes and we'll enjoy open communication with that person. On the contrary, when we make withdrawals and our balance becomes low or even overdrawn, bitterness, mistrust and discord develops. If we are to salvage the relationship, we must make a conscious effort to make regular deposits.
This post will discuss Covey's six major ways of making deposits into these Emotional Bank Accounts and how we can avoid making withdrawals.

1. Understanding the Individual
In Covey's book, seven habits of highly effective people, one of the seven habits is "seek first to understand then to be understood". Truly understanding what others are feeling is not always that easy. We must remove ourselves from our egocentric viewpoint and put ourselves into the minds and shoes of others. I say minds and shoes because we must try to first understand the thought patterns and second walk in their shoes or empathize with them.
One of my major faults when communicating with others is, while they are talking I tend to think what I am going to say next. Truly understanding someone requires us to wholly and completely concentrate on what the other person is trying to say, not reloading, just waiting to fire off your response

2. Keeping Commitments
Certainly when we break our promises to others, we make major withdrawals from their Emotional Bank Accounts. However, keeping commitments is not just relegated to promises. It also includes things such as arriving to work and appointments on time, fulfilling our duties, and living up to every word that comes out of our mouth.

3. Clarifying Expectations
There is nothing more frustrating in a relationship than not understanding what is expected of you. Although many of us wish we could be, we are not mind readers. And because each of us sees life differently and has different backgrounds and life experiences, expecting someone to just "know" is not only unfair but completely unrealistic. It's important that the person with whom you are dealing with, knows exactly what is expected of them. Doing this will keep them out of the dark and allow them to relate you confidently, knowing that what they are doing is in line with your expectations.

4. Attending to the Little Things
Little courtesies, kind words and warm smiles are at the heart of the little things that brighten up a relationship. It shows recognition and an awareness of others. It's interesting, but within our relationships, if you want success, it's the little things that really become the big things.

5. Showing Personal Integrity
Nothing is probably more damaging to a relationship, then a lack of integrity. Being that the Emotional Bank Account is based upon trust, you could essentially be doing all of the previous things, but without trust, it is to no avail. Integrity means wholeness, completeness, or soundness. In this case soundness of moral character. Integrity is the rock-solid foundation upon which all successful relationships are built.

6. Apologizing Sincerely When We Make a Withdrawal
Granted, we are all mortal. We make mistakes. That's part of life and learning. Knowing when you are wrong and admitting your mistakes prevents the wounds that you've caused in others from festering and allows them to heal. When appropriate, sincere apology will keep your relationships accounts in the positive, allowing you to maintain the balance that has been created in your application of all of the previous steps.

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[ ::: ♥Keep_Mailing♥ ::: ]™ Reasons for Negative Thoughts & Stress --- How to Avoid Them

I have learnt in my 33 years of life that human mind tends to think negative more than positive.
There are several contributing factors for negative thinking such as bad professional or personal circumstance, financial issues , health problems or relationship issues. This article helps you prepare on how to respond in some of the most common stress contributing situations:

Personal Circumstances: Remember that fact that life is what 20% happens to you and 80% how you react to it. Its only your own thinking; reactions responsible for our peace of mind. Regardless of the nature or complexity of life situations, there is always a way out. My personal recommendation to fix life's big issues is to break them into several small issues and start fixing one by one; one at a time. Remember that keep thinking negative on issues will keep increasing the weight of the problems. It's just like holding the glass of water for one minute compared to holding it for one hour compared to holding it for whole day. Off course the more time you hold it for, the more strain it will cause to your muscles and vice versa. This is exactly how your negative thoughts disturbs your brain and takes away your peace of mind.

Misunderstanding: "I am responsible for what I said but not responsible for what you understood". In principle, i agree to this but this is not how life works. Clear communication involves understanding the emotional aspect of your listener and then chose the most effective words to say what you want to say. Your job while speaking is to make sure that you elaborate your point very well by using right words and proper details. When listening make sure you conceive and understand the message correctly. In case of ambiguity, ask again, even again else there is a serious chance that a something incorrect or negative is going to be concluded. Clarity in our day to day communication can definitely wash away the element of misunderstanding. As said by Stephen Covey "Seek first to understand and then to be understood"

Financial Limitations: Life is beautiful, but we complicate it by adding more and more wishes into it. Recommendation is to always try differentiating between Needs and Wants. Try to live in your needs and you won't be sad again. Another recommendation is to think of less-fortunate people quite often instead of always dreaming about rich people. If you want to become rich, start working on it by preparing a concrete plan, however don't allow your plans steal your current peace of mind. Live in the current moment. Don't allow your brain to adopt short cuts which are based on negative strategies. Negative approaches result in negative outcomes; sooner or later. Hence, be positive and adopt positive approaches.

Family Relations: Having healthy family relations is a real blessing. This is something you can find hundreds of books on in the market or on internet but there are many basic tips and techniques through which relationships can be filled with love. A straight forward approach to resolve small conflicts is to 'Convince or Get Convinced'. There shouldn't be anything in between. For the bigger issues, the suggestion is to break the problem in small issues and fix it one by one, as stated earlier. Further, power of patience can help bring massive improvements in your life. Patience also means listening other empathetically and understand other's point of view. This helps conclude right things.

Office Stress: My personal formulae is that for any given situation apply two step formulae:
First filter is to ask yourself whether this issue is really something I should be worried about. If not, just drop and you are done. I have seen man people start poking thier noses for matters which are not really relevant or important. Mind it.
Second filter is to "Park" this problem for sometime in order to concentrate on things which are more important. 'Parking' has some advantages… for example, you are controlling your mind not to think of this particular issue for the time being and hence avoiding negativity and stress. Sometimes the issues are resolved at their own as we move along. However, if any issue really needs to be fixed then develop the power of analyzing the situation to breakdown it smaller issues and see the contributing factors and find out the root cause to fix it.

Overall speaking, no one is in charge of your happiness except you. Control your thoughts because thoughts are the driving force for your actions. Positive thoughts lead to positive actions.

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Friday, 13 April 2018

[ ::: ♥Keep_Mailing♥ ::: ]™ GRAND MA in Court

*GRANDMA  IN  COURT..* Brilliantly Hilarious: 


Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren't prepared for the answer!

In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand.

He approached her and asked; _"Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"_

She responded, _"Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams._ _I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a  big disappointment to me.._
_You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate  people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a  big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will  amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know  you.."_

The lawyer was stunned!  Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked,  _"Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney (the opponent's lawyer)?"_

She again replied, _"Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone  and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to  mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of  them was your wife. ..Yes I know him."_   

The defense attorney almost *died*.

The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet  voice said: 

_*"If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me,  I'll send you to jail for contempt of court !*

Enjoy a good laugh,  but don't laugh alone 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂