Horses With Better Hair Than You
Time to stop even trying with our lackluster manes, humans. Horses put us all to shame.
1. Horses have great hair. Better than yours, in fact. Have you ever been able to achieve this level of side-swept bang ferocity?
Via shutterstock.com
No. You haven't.
2. And this horse's hair is so utterly diaphanous, it looks fake. It's not; it's just preternaturally beautiful.
Via vanners.org
This horse feels sorry for you.
3. Even on a bad hair day, a horse's hair is still roughly 5,000% better than yours.
Via Shutterstock
Even the facial hair is spectacular.
4. Horses can do ombré in a subtle way that you haven't been able to master.
Peter aka anemoneprojectors / Via Flickr: anemoneprojectors
6. Horses are the only species capable of combining jet black and platinum blonde that in no way looks trashy.
Via vanners.org
I challenge you to do the same.
7. Although, their natural hair colors are superior to anything we humans could replicate with a bottle.
Alan Levine / Via Flickr: 37996646802@N01
The Farrah Fawcett of horses.
8. This hairstyle would look ridiculous on you. On this horse it's so adorable you can't even handle it.
Murky1 / Via Flickr: 73806619@N00
Basically she's the MPDG of horses.
9. Even awkward teenage horses still look more sophisticated and refined than you ever will as a human adult.
Ewan Munro / Via Flickr: 55935853@N00
10. Horse hair can do things that Pinterest tutorials can't even handle.
Steven Lilley / Via Flickr: 26170836@N05
So artful.
11. Like, how is this so beautiful? I would hang this picture on my wall as art.
carterse / Via Flickr: 81881849@N00
12. And this! Nobody's rows have ever been this festive.
Sorry, Snoop.
13. This is the hair that Coachella fangirls live for.
But cannot have.
14. And this horse has the beachy waves you've only previously seen in your dreams.
~carlinusje / Via carlinusje.deviantart.com
Suck it, Bumble and Bumble Surf Spray.
15. And you could probably see your reflection in the sheen of this horse's mane.
Via fanpop.com
Not that you would want to, because you'd be reminded of your own hair's inferiority.
16. The way a horse's hair catches the afternoon light is a sight to behold.
Via vanners.org
And it's said that if it happens to you, you'll be blessed with 100 years' good luck.
17. And how it floats in the wind. Not blows — floats.
*Angels chime in a heavenly chorus.*
18. Like, is this even real? This horse is SO. PRETTY.
Prettier than Jennifer Lawrence and Natalie Portman combined.
19. And admit it, if you saw this bombshell horse on the street, you'd ask to buy her a drink.
Hair is powerful that way.
20. Basically, horses are the most exquisitely coiffed of all living creatures.
Julian Wolkenstein / Via julianwolkenstein.com
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty.
Replace the words "I have to" with "I choose to" and notice the difference in how you feel.
The best kind of friend is the kind, you can sit with never say a word, and then walk away, feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.
The happiness you give makes you more happy than the happiness you receive.
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