- I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position.
- I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.
- You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I were in, chancesare you wouldn't have received anything at all.
- Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management
- I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
- Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
- The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.'individualsdid this over and over).
- Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
- Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.
- Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to leave me any messages.
- I've run away to join a different circus.
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